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Thursday, January 20, 2005


Evil Glenn goes Robbing: A Filthy Lie 

It was the middle of the night when the phone rang:

Sally: Who the f.. Hello?

Evil Glenn: Hi! Have you recently had an accident which was not your fault?

Sally: All my accidents have been my fault. You'll not satisfy your avid thirst for leeching through me!

Evil Glenn: Who is this? I thought I was calling Thailand!

Sally: Glenn! Surely you're not...

Evil Glenn: Oh, indeed! I'm bringing a lawsuit against God. Millions of them in fact.

Sally: Well who's to say it was an Act of God? It sounds more like the work of The Other Guy, if you ask me.

Evil Glenn: Hmmm...maybe I should be representing God in a defamation case instead.

Sally: So you want to sue insurance companies worldwide for libel against The Almighty? Can't you just do something slightly naughty, and preferably funny because, um... for no reason really...nothing to do with Harvey of course. Just a suggestion...

Evil Glenn: Heh. I'll have to get back to you on that one. Or not. Good luck with your latest assignment! Bwhahahaha!

*Click*


A few days later, I found some particularly "interesting" offers on eBay, so I called him up:

Sally: I know what your game is, Reynolds!

Evil Glenn: So what do you think? Beats stealing bicycles and the change out of the McDonalds collection boxes doesn't it?

Sally: Auctioning Harvey's new leather sofa? That's a bit tame...

Evil Glenn: His wife was on it at the time. Plus, I've yet to sell the specialist accessories it came with.

Sally: And T1G's car? I take it you committed the theft when he was indisposed?

Evil Glenn: Better that than his apartment!

Sally: Now that's just plain silly.

Evil Glenn: Are you sure you don't want to make a bid? I'm planning on stealing Boudicca's Voice next!

Sally: No!

Evil Glenn: Ogre's Politics and Views?

Sally: That's even sillier.

Evil Glenn: Is this silly?

Sally: What the...? You published an unauthorised book about me? You UTTER B...

Evil Glenn: Biographer! See you in court!

*Click*



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