Monday, October 11, 2004

Scary Urine 

Tara: Mummy. I did a wee wee and it was all horrible.

Me: Jesus Christ, it's five in the morning! Get back to bed.

Turns out I'm the worst mother in the world. For once, she wasn't just messing about. I looked in the toilet and nearly fainted. Dark pink urine. Her inner Barbie had gone too far. The worst case scenarios are flooding my mind: Abuse. Terminal illness. Then I calm down, get a doctor's appointment, and call London. I love them up there:

Specialist: So take her to the Doctor Who Doesn't Know What He's Talking About, and if it hasn't stopped by tomorrow, call me. You can give her a dose of Tranexamic, or bring her here.

Me: So what if the Doctor Who Doesn't Know What He's Talking About thinks it's a Urinary Tract Infection, despite her having no other symptons?

Specialist: Ignore him. Just get him to check there's no injury.

Ha! So, I'm off to TDWDKWHTA with a sample of scary urine. I'll try to keep calm.

UPDATE: Dr Clueless just excelled himself.

"This doesn't look like blood at all. I'll just do a test....Hmmm, this is full of blood!"

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